[Leica] OT Completely : Humour

[lug at steveunsworth.co.uk (Steve Unsworth)]

Strange how he missed the bit about Americans moving from "behaving like
arseholes" to "behaving like total arseholes".

Steve


On 13/7/07 23:29, "GREG LORENZO" <gregj.lorenzo@shaw.ca> wrote:

> An Update on Security Alerts
> 
>      Author: David
> Duval
>  
>
> The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats 
> and
> have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved."
> Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or 
> even
> "A Bit Cross." Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 
> 1940
> when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists themselves have been
> re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the
> British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire 
> of
> 1666.
>  
> 
>  
> Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its 
> terror
> alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are
> "Surrender" and "Collaborate." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire 
> that
> destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's
> military capability.
> It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of 
> alert.
> Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to
> "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat
> Operations" and "Change Sides."
> The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to
> "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher 
> levels:
> "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."
> Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only 
> threat
> they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.
> The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. 
> These
> beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can 
> get a
> really good look at the old Spanish navy.