[Leica] Political Correctness-----Maybe off topic

[Bill Erfurth <m6rf@yahoo.com>]

Hi Gang,

From time to time certain members of this group have,
for what ever reason, accused me of NOT being
Politically Correct (PC).  Well, I decided to change
my ways and, I offer the following as an example of my
new PC mind set.


HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE  POLITICALLY CORRECT

  1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED 
AMERICAN.
   2. She is not a BLEACHED BLONDE - She is PEROXIDE
DEPENDENT.
   3. She is not a BAD COOK - She is MICROWAVE
COMPATIBLE.
   4. She is not HALF NAKED - She is WARDROBE
IMPAIRED.
   5. She does not wear TOO MUCH JEWELRY - She is
METALLICALLY   OVERBURDENED.
   6. She is not CONCEITED - She is INTIMATELY AWARE
OF HER
BEST QUALITIES.
   7. She does not GAIN WEIGHT - She is a METABOLIC 
UNDERACHIEVER.
  8. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY
APPRECIATIVE.
  9. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
  10. She does not TEASE or FLIRT - She engages in
ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION.
  11. She is not TOO SKINNY - She is SKELETALLY
PROMINENT.
  12. She does not WEAR TOO MUCH PERFUME - She commits
FRAGRANCE ABUSE.
  13. She is not KINKY - She is a NON-INHIBITED SEXUAL

COMPANION.
  14. She does not WEAR TOO MUCH MAKEUP - She has
reached 
COSMETIC MATURATION.
  15. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is
GRAVITY
RESISTANT.
==========================================================

- - - - AND THERE IS MORE - - -


   HOW TO TALK ABOUT MEN AND STILL BE POLITICALLY
CORRECT

  1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has a LIQUID
GRAIN
STORAGE  FACILITY.
  2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
  3. He doesn't GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He
investigates
ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
 4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
 5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers
GENERATIONALLY  DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS.
  7. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK-He becomes
ACCIDENTALLY  HORIZONTAL.
  8. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a
case
of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.
  9. He is not a SEX MACHINE - He is ROMANTICALLY 
AUTOMATED.
  10. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has  SWINE
EMPATHY.
  11. He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES - He  has
an
INTROSPECTIVE PORNOGRAPHIC MOMENT.
  12. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is
MONOGAMOUSLY 
CHALLENGED.




















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