[Leica] The mother of all flames

[quem <annecy@hsnp.com>]

(Enter flamee's name here), it's with serious hesitation that I share
with the group my opinion of you and your presence here on the
Lug where there are people of true character and value. 

You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As
they say in Texas, I'll bet you couldn't pour piss out of a boot with
instructions on the heel. You are a canker.  A sore that won't go
away.  I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You're a
putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm
deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad,
a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a
revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon. You are equivalent to the
seeping pus from the afterbirth of an aboriginal gang bang, left lying
in the sun for three days. You are a bleating foal, a curdled
staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal
accompanying your alleged birth in to this world. An insensate,
blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling,
giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in
recognition of what they had done.  

I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same
species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at
the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut.
Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are
a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you
smell?   You snail-skulled, little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you
up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you
loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy
pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy,
convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs.  You are weary,
stale, flat and unprofitable. 

You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and
disgusting. You're a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you.
Even sheep won't have sex with you.  You are unreservedly pathetic,
starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot. And
what meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements
of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with me and the others
on this list?  What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your
tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat,
spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?  You
are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and
obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living
emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile.
You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling
meatslapper.  On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool.


You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the
personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and
benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery
and sorrow wherever you go.  You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody
woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock.  You grotty wanking oik artless
base-court apple-john. You clouted boggish foot-licking twit. You
dankish clack-dish plonker. You gormless crook-pated tosser. You
churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce.  You cockered bum-bailey
poofter. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naïf. You
gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You dread-bolted fobbing
beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill.  You are a fiend and a coward,
and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I
feel debased just for knowing you exist. 

I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away.  I
cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid.
Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond
the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid.  You
are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid.  Stupid collapsed on itself, so
far, that even the neutrons have collapsed.  Stupid gotten so dense
that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid.  Blazing hot mid-day
sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our
entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a
troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this
is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some
pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be
beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I can't go on.  

This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear
from me again for a while. I don't have enough strength left to deride
your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant
trivia, or any of the rest of your drivel.  Duh.  The only thing worse
than your logic is your manners. I delete all of your posts because,
well... they never really say anything. Maybe later in life, after you
have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more
success.  True, these are rudimentary skills that  us "normal" people
take for granted and have an easy time mastering. But we sometimes
forget that there are "challenged" persons in this world such as
yourself.  Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the
best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to
be placing such a demand on you. 

(Enter flamer's name here)
    
P.S.   Almost forgot.  You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent,
vengeful, cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable,
belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic,
bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged,
imbecilic,
insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, Byzantine,
conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic,
ignorant, 
clueless, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking,
devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist,
dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling,
restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dystopic, stifling,
uncaring, 
plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive,
aggressive, mind-numbing, abrasive, poisonous, flagrant,
self-destructive, abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, clueless, and
generally Not Good.  I Hope you CHOKE on any adoption search you
should undertake.  Any questions?