Re: [Leica] Wildly off topic, but at times so apropos!

["Dan Post" <dpost@triad.rr.com>]

Group-
First of all- let me apologise if this offends anyone, but in the past some
folks have made comments about the syntax or grammar of some of our members,
for whom English is not their first or even second or third language!
I am ever amazed that English is so flexible, and that once your ear hears
it, even if fractured by various creoles, patois, or dialects- that it still
remains understandable!
I personally salute anyone of our non-English speaking members that even
contemplates trying to understand and speak English! It is a formidable
task- it seems that "English" has so many accepted variations, that it is
not surprising that some might sound strange to us.... at first hearing!
I was sent this little 'dialogue' and I pass it on to you 'native' English
speaking members- not to denigrate the example, but to show how even the
most tortured English can be comprehended! Enjoy- read it aloud, to get the
full effect!

Bubba (Some people call hit a sling blade, but ah call hit a Kaiser
blade....) Post

TENDJEWBERRYMUD
It's amazing!  You will understand the above word by the end of the
conversation...

Read aloud for best results. "Tendjewberrymud"

Be warned, you're going to find yourself talking "funny" for a while after
reading this. This has been nominated for best email of 1999.

The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service
at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the Far East
Economic
Review...

Room Service (RS): "Morny. Ruin sorbees"
Guest (G): "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service"

RS:  "Rye..Ruin sorbees..morny!  Djewish to odor sunteen??"
G:  "Uh..yes...I'd like some bacon and eggs."

RS: "Ow July den?"
G: "What??"

RS: "Ow July den?...pry, boy, pooch?"
G : "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please."

RS: "Ow July dee bayhcem...crease?"
G: "Crisp will be fine."

RS : "Hokay. An San tos?"
G: "What?"

RS:"San tos. July San tos?"
G: "I don't think so"

RS: "No? Judo one toes??"
G: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo one toes'
means."

RS: "Toes! toes!...why djew Don Juan toes? Ow bow singlish mopping we
bother?"
G: "English muffin!!  I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.'  Fine. Yes,an
English muffin will be fine."

RS: "We bother?"
G: "No...just put the bother on the side."

RS: "Wad?"
G: "I mean butter...just put it on the side."

RS: "Copy?"
G: "Sorry?"

RS: "Copy...tea...mill?"
G: "Yes. Coffee please, and that's all."

RS: "One Minnie. Ass ruin torino fee, strangle ache, crease baychem,tossy
singlish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy....rye??"
G: "Whatever you say"

RS: "Tendjewberrymud"
G : "You're welcome."