[Leica] Thanks to BD and John Szarkowski

[geebee at geebeephoto.com (GeeBee)]

From: "David Mason" <masonster@gmail.com>

Subject: Re: [Leica] Thanks to BD and John Szarkowski


>my theory teacher had better stories
> anyway - especially the one about the cello player who was told by a
> conductor to quit "scratching that thing between her legs".
>
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Hi David,

Sir Thomas Beecham was the conductor and this is a fuller version:

"Madam, you have between your legs an instrument capable of giving pleasure
to thousands, and all you can do is scratch it! "

If you Google his name you will find many more:

"Try everything once except folk dancing and incest."

"Brass bands are all very well in their place - outdoors and several miles
away."

"There are two golden rules for an orchestra: start together and finish
together. The public doesn't give a damn what goes on in between."

"If an opera cannot be played by an organ grinder, it's not going to achieve
immortality."

on the sound of a harpsichord - "two skeletons copulating on a tin roof in a
thunderstorm."

on an unidentified soprano in Die Walk?re - "Her singing reminds me of a
cart coming downhill with the brake on."

to a musician during a rehearsal - "We cannot expect you to be with us all
the time, but perhaps you could be good enough to keep in touch now and
again."

on Bruckner's Seventh Symphony - "In the first movement alone, I took note
of six pregnancies and at least four miscarriages."

Sir Thomas Beecham was once asked if he had played any Stockhausen. "No," he
replied, "but I have trodden in some."



--Graham