[Leica] Re: [OT] Uh.... earth to wannabe lawyers (long)

[Andrew Nemeth <azn@nemeng.com>]

I normally don't contribute to these off-topic blatherings,
but I simply couldn't let this one pass without comment,
even if my remarks will draw an inordinate amount of heat...


The "rule of law" has been perverted into the "rule of lawyers".

As an ex-intellectual property solicitor from one of the
"big four" Sydney law firms - I can say without hesitation
that all legal practitioners, everywhere, at any time, are
degenerate, thieving, sleazy, intellectually and morally
dishonest social and corporate parasites, whose solitary
criteria for existence is self-enrichment and aggrandisement
at the cost to anyone and every thing around them.

Here are some anecdotes to mull over:

o  The routine practice of hiring successful lawyers
   from other firms and then burying them just to kill
   the competitor firm's practice - ruining the lawyer's
   career in the meantime.  This is precisely what happened
   to the associate I worked with.

o  Senior partners never deal with clients and don't have
   the foggiest idea what the case is about, and yet they
   (fraudulently) bill the client for days of their time,
   even though they never touched the file beyond the initial
   30 minute face-to-face interview.

o  Another senior partner sent me off to research an area
   of law which does not exist (NSW Administrative Appeals
   and Judicial Review).  I gently told him this, but he
   aggressively insisted.  So I went off to the library(ies),
   checked out a lot of books, made lots of photocopies
   and politely gave him a presentation which concluded
   with what I told him in the first place, much to his
   disgust and surprise.  "So What?" I hear you say - it
   turns out this partner was the firm's Admin Lawyer
   practice specialist.  (Imagine going to a dermatologist
   who has no idea what shingles are...)

o  An accidental full-hysterectomy performed on a woman by
   a tired/incompetent doctor - who admits on the first page
   of the case-file that he did the wrong operation.  Despite
   this the lawfirm (who represents the doctor's Defence Union)
   stalls the case and 7 years after the unauthorized sterilization
   the matter still had not gone to trial.

o  Sending 50 page faxes to the opposing side's lawfirm and
   leaving out 3 or 4 pages, neccessitating numerous phone
   calls and letters before re-sending the 50 page fax again.
   Meanwhile your and their clients are being billed for all
   of this.

o  The little fraud of working 50-70 hours a week, and yet
   your payslip indicates payment for 38-hours work.

o  Promotion and cases being dolled out according to
   lunchtime touch-football playing prowess (I'm not
   kidding - a colleague's career took a dive when he
   injured his knee and couldn't play for one of the
   senior partner's hand-picked "dream team").

o  A major case being lost and the client having to
   pay $ 100Ks in settlement because Thursday
   Nite lawyer-lads drunkenly broke into one of the
   associate's offices, stole what turned out to be
   a crucial piece of evidence (a jockey's cap!) and
   then lost it.

I could go on-and-on.  And keep in mind I was only there
for 5 months and this was with one of Sydney's (and therefore
Australia's) largest an most prestigious lawfirms.

So it is hardly surprising I look back on my short
period of lawyering with a mixture of contempt and disgust.

I am continually surprised that supposedly intelligent
people can engage in lawyering in public and not be
ashamed of themselves.  Indeed some even imagine they are
doing something noble and worthwhile.  They Are Not.



AZN


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