Archived posting to the Leica Users Group, 2001/04/05

[Author Prev] [Author Next] [Thread Prev] [Thread Next] [Author Index] [Topic Index] [Home] [Search]

Subject: Re: [Leica] Even Worse Than Scotches: IE Linguistics (OT)
From: "Dan Post" <dpost@triad.rr.com>
Date: Thu, 5 Apr 2001 11:45:09 -0400
References: <000f01c0bd30$35fe1de0$9600000a@sander> <20010404220004.18150@mail.mindspring.com>

Say, while we're beating this thread to death, I thought I'd interject this
item, sent to me by someone totally unrelated to the LUG- actually, it was
from my wife's cousin, so I guess she might be considered related- a cousin
four times removed? Sheis from West Palm Beach, so we may have to recount
that...again!

Dan



"NEW LANGUAGE

The European Commission has just announced an agreement
whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than
German which was the old language.

   The European Commission has just announced an agreement
whereby English will be the official language of the EU
rather than German which was the other possibility. As
part  of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded
that  English spelling had some room for improvement and has
accepted a 5 year phase-in plan that would be known as
"Euro-English".

  In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".
Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The
hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the"k". This should klear
up  konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.

  There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond
year,  when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f".
This  will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

  In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling
kan be  ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated
changes  are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of
double  letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate
speling.  Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent
"e"s in  the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

 By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such
as  replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz
year,  ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"
and  similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer
kombinations of leters.

 After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten
styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find
it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And
zen ve vil tak over ze  world! "

In reply to: Message from "Sander van Hulsenbeek" <vanhulsenbeek@wxs.nl> ([Leica] Even Worse Than Scotches: IE Linguistics (OT))
Message from Daniel Bowdoin <danlb@mindspring.com> (Re: [Leica] Even Worse Than Scotches: IE Linguistics (OT))