Archived posting to the Leica Users Group, 1999/01/16

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Subject: [Leica] A little levity -- Completely off-topic
From: quem <annecy@hsnp.com>
Date: Sat, 16 Jan 1999 11:04:12 -0600

I know this guy whose neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from
having been served a rat in his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken. So
anyway, one day he went to sleep and when he awoke he was in his bathtub
and it was
full of ice and he was sore all over. When he got out of the tub he
realized that HIS KIDNEYS HAD BEEN STOLEN and he saw a note on his mirror
that said
"Call 911!"  But he was afraid to use his phone because it was connected to
his
computer, and there was a virus on his computer that would destroy his hard
drive if he opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!" He knew it wasn't a
hoax because he himself was a computer programmer who was working on
software to save us from Armageddon together & distribute the $600 Neiman
Marcus cookie recipe under the leadership of Bill Gates. (It's true-I read
it all last week in a private e-mail from BILL GATES HIMSELF, who was also
promising me a free Disney World vacation and $5,000 if I would forward the
e-mail
to everyone I know.) The poor man then tried to call 911 from a pay phone
to report
his  missing kidneys, but reaching into the coin-return slot he got jabbed
with  an HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said,
"Welcome  to the world of AIDS."

Luckily he was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one, actually,
where that little boy who is dying of cancer is, the one whose last wish
is for everyone in the world to send him an e-mail and the American
Cancer Society has agreed to pay him a nickel for every e-mail he receives. I
sent him two e-mails and one of them was a bunch of x's and o's in the
shape of an angel (if you get it and forward it to twenty people you will have
good luck, forward to ten people you will only have ok luck and if you send
it to less than ten people you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS). So
anyway the poor guy tried to drive himself to the hospital, but on the way he
noticed another car driving along without his lights on. To be helpful,
he flashed his lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a gang
initiation.

quem